The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
