There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Swine flu. Run for my life!
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
