And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Still dying that you shit outside
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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