is this the sara with the beer cane?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
