first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Randomize
