My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
