btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
