I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
