you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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