We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize