Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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