So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
