tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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