Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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