IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
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