im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
