It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
it was like eating out sand paper
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
