then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
he had hair everywhere except his balls
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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