she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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