saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Randomize
