They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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