Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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