I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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