Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I'm at about main and main street
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
