I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
