Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
