You work out of a Hotel?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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