Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Everclear isn't food dammit
How drunk are you?
Completed.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
