just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
It was confusing and full of hummus
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Come see our sink grown plant.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Randomize