I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
