There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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