he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize