I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
