I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Randomize
