My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
