i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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