i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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