he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
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