we need to drink 2009 down the drain
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
