That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
