we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize