thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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