I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
