She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize