this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
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