More tranny stories later!
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
