I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize