Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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