you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Randomize
