I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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